Diary of a Confused Black Woman

I've Lost It

Recently I've been thinking about my ex that I lived with. I thought how I fucked up...how I left a relationship...althought it was skewed I left it for what? Because I don't have peace of mind or happiness outside of it now? It's been a whole year and I contacted him and we spoke and then he blocked my number. I mean we spoke and we talked about us and things sounded okay and then he blocked my number. I thought it was sad and funny at the same time.

Yesterday I heard a statement made on the radio about relationships and young people it said: It is the most beautiful worst decision you can make. Because young people don't understand how you can love someone and hate them at the same time. And in order to have that grandparents love, staying together for 40, 50, 60 years; you have to be able to work on it. You have to know that there will be rough patches that last longer than a couple of months.

That's when I thought back to myself...he asked me to change several times and I did immediately but I asked him to change some things and he just did not...it got to the point where we were arguing all of the time, not having sex, and being resentful and stuff to one another. I wonder if we would have heard this statement earlier we would have understood each other soon. I mean, really I thought he would never change, don't ask me if he changed now because guess what he blocked my number...oh damn!

Labels: change, I'm lost, the past

posted by cherry's kid @ 7:24 AM