Diary of a Confused Black Woman

You Have Potential...Hell So Do I

I said that very statement the other day to someone.... you have potential. My friend MA, she knows who she is, wrote something to me the other day. She said that we as black women have to have faith that the one we want will come along and that at the end of 60 years we should be able to sit back and say did he make me happy. I pose this theory to MA and you my blogger friends.

Now don't get me wrong...I didn't develop this theory over night. This is something I have been working on since the break up. Here it is: Oh And Don't Judge Me!!!
My Theory: Black Women get into relationships with Men [race doesn't matter] for the potential they have to make her happy. Yes that is my theory!

So how did I get here and why. No problem, I'll explain it. I had internship yesterday and I sat back and listened to the other interns and the supervisor and we just talked. Four black women at different stages in their lives talked. Our supervisor, 58 but so truthfully and will check you when you aren't true to yourself. Intern T, 28 married expecting child. Intern S, 27 single raising a family member on her own. And myself 25, single with a dog, living at home.

Every single one of them except for our supervisor said that the current relationship they were in with guy, when they first met him they only saw potential but since he has been using that kinetic energy [that potential] and actually doing something then they fell in love with that man. That's Bullshit my supervisor said, "black women need to get this fair tale, Cinderella sweep me off my feet dream out of their heads". When she said that it rang so true for me.

We get into relationships with people for the potential they have. We see they are turning their lives around. We see that they are attempting to attend school. We see they they are trying to do something. But the thing is, potential doesn't get you anywhere. So what if a guy has potential? That doesn't mean he is going to realize his potential nor does it mean that he will even want to achieve his potential! See we get into relationships thinking the goals someone has will always be achieved and we will live happily ever after. SIKE! Potential is just want it is defined as:

po·ten·tial Pronunciation Key - [puh-ten-shuhl]
1. possible, as opposed to actual.
2. capable of being or becoming.
3. Grammar. expressing possibility: the potential subjunctive in Latin.
4. Archaic. potent1. –noun
5. possibility; potentiality: an investment that has little growth potential.
6. a latent excellence or ability that may or may not be developed.
7. Grammar.
a. a potential aspect, mood, construction, case, etc.
b. a form in the potential.
8. Electricity. electric potential (def. 1).
9. Mathematics, Physics.
10. someone or something that is considered a worthwhile possibility.

In that definition do you see anything about how potential is actualized? NO.... I'll say it again....NO YOU DON'T!!!!! So I say to you, potential is just that, potential for something to happen. Potential for someone to make you happen, potential for something great! But also potential for something not to work out at all! Men with potential are great but men who have actualized their potential is what I want!!!

potential. (n.d.). Dictionary.com Unabridged (v 1.1). Retrieved January 20, 2008, from Dictionary.com website: http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/potential

Labels: Cinderella, confusion, kinetic energy, lust

posted by cherry's kid @ 8:15 AM