Diary of a Confused Black Woman

WHAT THE F*CK! AND ALL OTHER OBSCENITIES!!!!

I had to call my girl Q today and ask her if I was crazy! No I am crazy but I had to ask if I was really, really, really crazy...This is what had happened (you know it's a n*gga story when it starts off with that!) About a month ago (maybe like 2 weeks, I like to repress bad memories) a guy I had been dealing with for almost 6 months decided he wanted to just let me go! I was cool with that but I was hurt! I know you're thinking yeah right because for some reason my life looks like all a girl knows is money, cars, and guys; but that's not true. I was just with him and only him, 'the army guy' my friends referred to him as. Everything was straight, hanging out with him and his boys, dinner/breakfast with his parents, trips out of town, concerts, dinner, any and everything you can think of...plus his face time was serious. Side Bar, Dictionary - Face Time, verb, to partake in oral pleasure of a woman. Anyway, long story short I was his girlfriend and he was the first guy I thought of more than I thought of Unbreakable! Scary! But out of the blue this dude just started spazzing one day and was like "I don't want to do this anymore!" I was like what? I was confused, what do you mean you don't want to do this anymore. He was like he was just done he didn't want to do it anymore...Of course I cussed him out and then I left it alone...from there I was like f*ck it, no more of this I'm pink and soft because of a man. Side Bar, Dictionary - Pink & Soft, noun, to be girlie and do things for a guy out of the kindness of your heart. I'm taking it back to freshman year of college to high school mentality ... Treat all men like the hos they are! Yeah, 2000 mentality is back! I don't have time for this sh*t! Well the bullsh*t gets worst. So like today I was chilling with the parents farting around watching TV, cracking jokes, and drinking way before noon! I didn't hear my cell phone ring, when I got to my apartment and looked at it there was a missed call from 'the army guy', so I did the natural thing a girl would do I waited mad long before I called him back. When I did this n*gga was apologizing saying his parents were about to break up and he just wanted some time alone to deal with it so he decided to tell me that I wasn't sh*t and I wasn't right for him in order for him to get rid of me so that he can deal with that problem and now that everything was over he wanted to apologize for the way he did that and wanted to be my friend! WTF - What The F*CK! I know, I said that too...But you know what I did the typical thing, I blacked on him (cussed him out) and then hung up. But I thought about it and called back like 2 hours later and let him know that he really hurt me and that I can't be his friend, because it won't work how do I know he won't be disloyal again. I did tell him I was sorry about his family situation and I hope everything is straight now but I can't be his friend because if he was my friend first he would have realized that the way he ended it was unfair and hurtful. Side Bar, why when dudes can't deal with things they just cut everyone off? If you're going to do that just let a girl know that you need some time to yourself and you'll get back at her when everything is straight and you'll explain the rest later. A REAL WOMAN can take that explanation more than, I'm done with you just because! Anyway, long story short...like Mariah says, I got to shake it off! Right now I'm back on the grind, no more Pink & Soft Cherry's Kid! The Kid Is Back! And in the words of 36 Mafia, I gotta stay Fly, i, i, i, i, i, i, i, i...Till I die, ie, ie, ie, ie, ie, ie, ie, ie!!!!!!!

posted by cherry's kid @ 7:59 PM